Olivanders at 5 Months

Oliver Fitzgerald Warren is an UNBELIEVABLE baby. Like so good that I feel guilty bragging about how good he is. I feel like I need to convince you that I would still totally adore him if he fussed all the time and was high-maintenance. Because I totally would - but he is just the sweetest baby ever. He sleeps well, smiles all the time, loves to laugh - he even seems to enjoy it when Holds smothers him with kisses and laughs really loud in his ear.

He's incredible. If you haven't met him, you need to. Seeing him smile is like getting a 10,000 iu dose of Vitamin D. He's pure joy.

Gut and Psychology Syndrome

Do you have an open mind? I'm just saying - if you are reading this, I would suggest an open mind. The reality is that Wes and I are willing to try ANYTHING to help Holden succeed in life and be as productive, healthy and happy as possible.

As I've been researching Autism, one of the most influential theories I've read is the Gut and Psychology Syndrome. It's a theory by Dr. Natasha Campbell-McBride, a Russian/English Neurologist/Nutritionist who believes that the reason so many kids have autism, food allergies, ADHD, etc is because of improper gut flora. You should read her paper on it to get a quick feel for the theory and what she's found in working with hundreds of Autistic kids.

She just published a book, called Gut And Psychology Syndrome. Natural Treatment Of Autism, ADHD, Dyslexia, Dyspraxia, Depression And Schizophrenia and check out this and it focuses just on Autism. I've even read on her website gaps.me that it's a great treatment for celiac and food allergies.

If you want to hear a quick introduction to her GAPS theory and hear her speak, check out this YouTube video.

The GAPS diet she recommends sounds pretty extreme at first, but that's just the introduction diet. The Full GAPS diet is basically eating healthy foods and avoiding additives that we all know we should avoid anyway, but we don't.

Her intro diet is casein and gluten free, but she slowly allows the introduction of other foods like raw milk and raw cheeses that have natural forms of casein.

Side note - it FREAKS me out that casein, a natural milk protein, has been taken out of where it is naturally found (breast milk, animal milk, etc) and been put into EVERYTHING. It's the same thing with gluten. Foods that have NO RIGHT to have gluten in it, have gluten in it. Did you know they put casein in hot dogs to plump them up? Deli meat? There isn't ONE food at McDonald's that doesn't have casein in it. It's seriously so unnatural and freaky what food scientists have done to our food.

So the GAPS diet is a purist diet - it seals the gut to prevent leaky gut syndrome and promotes good bacteria. There are stories out there of people healing their food allergies with this diet, healing autism, ADHD, and all sort of other issues.

We ordered the book and are just waiting for it to come. Y'all might think I'm crazy and this is just pie-in-the-sky. But the reality is - I will do ANYTHING for my son. Even put my entire family on a crazy, restrictive diet. Actually, Wes is just as excited as I am. I'm probably more addicted to sugar than he is, so the die-off period of the bad toxins will probably be worse for me than him.

I think I'm going to keep a videography on it and capture how it goes....

Autism: The Theories Behind the Cause

Every moment that I'm not at work or feeding/playing with my children, I find myself reading about Autism. Wes and I both are obsessed. I realized yesterday, as we were at the Gateway Mall hanging out with the kids, that our every conversation is about autism: what we've read lately, who we've talked to lately about it, which new theories we've researched. I think it will be this way for a long, long time.

We watched a documentary called "Decoding Autism" on Friday night. They went through a variety of theories and tests on it.

I didn't realize that when you have one kid on the spectrum your chances of having another are increased. Great. They talked a lot about whether it's environmental or genetics. Autism affects 1 in 70 boys. Did you know that? That seems high. Why is it so high?

It's a pretty controversial topic, where no one seems to listen to each other. Many doctors think it's genetic*, (*Note that this gene finding only accounts for 15% of autistic children). Parents blame vaccines. Others say it's pollution, toxins in our environment, and others say food allergies.

There are thousands of parents out there who firmly believe that their child was perfectly find and developing language normally but then got the MMR vaccine and regressed right after that. Doctors avidly dispute this, of course, and say it's just a correlation because the age when kids receive the MMR is the same age where autism can finally be noticed. I just find it interesting that everyone is talking and no one is agreeing.

I'll get into all the possible treatments another day, but some parents swear by restricting certain types of foods and that it has cured their children. Doctors say there is no evidence that this is the case. And they are right - because who would pay for a study about how taking out all additive foods can help with autism? KRAFT? I think not.

No, what they ARE spending money on are studies where the medical community benefits for being brilliant.

For example, they are studying brain patterns in little kids with older autistic siblings for early detection. They study electrical stimulation in these toddlers to see if they can identify Autism earlier.

The Institute of Health is funding a project on older kids 8-18 on the spectrum using Repetitive Transcranial Magnetic Stimulation (TMS).

All this research and the fact that everything is still so debatable would be fascinating to me if it weren't MY kid that had it.

Autism Awareness Month

April is Autism Awareness Month. Interesting, since this April is the month we were informed that Holden has Autism Spectrum Disorder. Step one of dealing with a new diagnosis is to let your friends and family know. But it's hard to talk about. We're still trying to process it - what it means, what do to, where to turn, how to deal with it. And I don't really know what to say to anybody else.

Turns out, so far, it's often the case that I tell someone and they're incredulous and they fight the diagnosis TO ME! I feel like I have to stand there and CONVINCE them that my son is retarded. And I don't want to do that.

The reality is that we're so used to him that we've normalized his behavior for years, too. So he prefers to play alone . . . a lot of kids do. So he can't communicate . . . he's only 3. So he doesn't like hugs . . . we have personal space issues too. So he echoes what you say . . . maybe that's normal. So he memorizes shows and uses them in conversations . . . So he throws tantrums all the time . . . So he lines up his toys in a perfect line . . .

You get the gist.

I'm passed the guilt (I think). I'm passed the blame. I am not bursting into tears every 2 hours anymore. I think that means we're in the acceptance phase, which doesn't mean it's easy or anything. I'm just dealing with it by reading everything I can get my hands on. So stay tuned, this blog may turn into my new coping mechanism.

"Of all the animals, the boy is the most unmanageable." - Plato

It's a boy!!! I have to admit that even though I was sure it would be a boy, I secretly hoped I'd be having a girl. Reason #1) I could justify stopping. Why try for a third if I have a boy and a girl? Reason #2) Boys are wild and crazy. There is already too much cave-man like testosterone in my house and with a third I will be super outnumbered. But something happened during the ultra sound a couple weeks ago. It's hard to describe but looking at O. Fitz (baby's name will be Oliver Fitzgerald) in the monitor made me feel like he was exactly the right fit for our family - exactly what we need.

Here are the great things about having another boy:

1) I don't have to buy any new clothes. Let's face it, girls are way more fun to shop for and I'd spend a fortune on my girl. But with another boy, I already have it all.

2) Holden will have a little buddy to show the ropes to. Every boy needs a brother to play pranks on, hang out with, and fight over girls with. They'll like that.

3) An extra shot. If I screw up in raising Holden to be a good boy, I can maybe redeem myself in O. Fitz :)

No but seriously I'm really excited. The first part of this pregnancy was really emotionally hard for me. My last pregnancy ended so sadly that I almost didn't allow myself to get attached to this one. So I had all the sickness and pukiness of pregnancy without any of the hope and expectation. So when I started feeling better and feeling this baby, I finally allowed myself to get excited.

And I am so excited. The ultra sound was beautiful. O. Fitz has Holden's nose (well Wes's nose, really which is just so darn cute) and he was sucking his thumb and moving all over. He's a mover, this one. I have a posterior placenta so I feel everything really clearly, which is great for me.

It feels so right to bring another boy into this family. I am so excited to meet him, but for now I'm happy he's doing so well inside me. Anyway, that's our good news.

Best Friends Best Friends

Holden has a BFF - I never expected him to have one so early on, but he cherishes his friend Harrison so much. Every time we say "Guess who's coming over?" he yells "Hahsson!" Here's why: for the past year and a half (my goodness has it been that long) his mom and I have been doing regular kid swaps. He comes over here once a week for the afternoon and Holds goes over there once a week for the afternoon. It has been one of the best things for the moms and the kids. They play really well together, take naps at the same time, and have so much fun learning and playing together. Plus I've really liked how it's allowed Holden to learn how to share, take turns, and get used to being around other people his age. And sometimes it's totally easier to have a friend over here to play with for Holds so he's occupied than it is with just him - as long as they play well together. And he and Harr are great together. I really feel so lucky that it's worked out so well.



Looking for bugs.

Goodnight Moon

holden has a very strict bedtime regimen now. we used to be able to just drop him in his crib and say a prayer and we were outta there! but now he has to read books to himself for a while (he's especially fond of anything about dinosaurs), then he likes to read Goodnight Moon 123 and then Goodnight Moon. in that order. and then he'll lay down and say prayers. he's so cute. at first, we just read the books to him but now he reads them to us.

this is holds reading Goodnight Moon:

BACK WITH A VENGEANCE

the shift key on my laptop isn't functioning. if i hold it down and press really hard it will work, but it slows my 80 wpm typing considerably, so i'll have to write in lower caps until my awesome husband decides which laptop is perfect for me (he's doing research on it right now even). THE OTHER OPTION IS THIS - BUT I HATE ALL CAPS, IT FEELS LIKE I'M YELLING. and i'm not yelling - promise.

i sat down tonight and decided to start blogging again. i realized that i have missed this holden-and-family-centered blog of mine. i went through it tonight and read the posts i made when i was pregnant with holden. i'm pregnant again with his soon-to-be brother or sister (yay!) and i can't believe how much bigger i am this time around. let's just say i won't be posting any bare belly pictures this time. yikes.

i've missed talking about my beautiful, crazy, wild, loving, smart, silly, sweet, busy boy. in case you've missed him too - here are some pictures of him that wes took in tooele this weekend. we were there to memorialize my grandfather who passed a few months ago.

Sad Day

I am a little sorry to do this, but we're going to be taking a hiatus for a while. Probably a long while. Work has been so busy and I can't keep up two [personal blogs AND blogs, writing, Facebooks, etc. for my clients. And Wes hasn't been posting on here for some time because he's been working on a ton of side projects too. Sooooo, it is with great regret that we say goodbye for a while. We'll still be reading your blogs so don't forget about us. And I will still be keeping up my other blog alicesworld.wordpress.com and will include updates on Holds there!

Thanks for all the reading and comments!

New Words and Potty Training

Ever since he turned 19 months, Holden's world (and therefore ours) has turned much more verbal. He likes to name everything. He finally calls everybody in our family by their names: Kiera is Key, Katie is Kay, Ali is Aheee, etc. We stand in front of my closet and he touches all the different types of clothes and he goes through and names them, or repeats after me. My favorite is that he just started saying Thank You when he hands you thing. He says it "sanky."

I love that I can now discuss things with Holden - he understands the things that I say. Like if I need to set him down to get something, I can explain it to him sans the tantrum that used to ensue. Now he gets it most of the time. I like it.

Holden and I have started taking a Mom and Tot art class! It's basically a mom art class for us because Holden only lasts on each project about 10 minutes. And he never acts like he likes anything he's made until a couple days later. Yesterday, he came out of his room wearing this new hat we made. He looks like an Indian.


Holden has also started potty training. We're taking it slow - at first we just had him sit down on his toilet every now and then. But he wouldn't "go" until last night - Wes had him sitting there, reading books and talking on the phone (which Holden tried to flush down the potty a couple times). I was so proud of him! As soon as I got him, he took me in the bathroom to come show me what he did. He was so excited he held onto the tub and ran in place for 4 minutes shouting with excitement. It was so cute.

Trip to Phoenix

So we went to Phoenix last week! Although Phoenix has never been on my top 10 places I want to vacate to, we actually managed to do a lot of cool things.

We chilled at the pool and got sunburned...a must for ANY vacation, duh.
Holden sporting his awesome surfing outfit. You know, just in case.

I pulled out my 15 year old bikini for one last preview and discovered that I actually fill it out LESS than I did 15 years ago. Not so nice, but that's motherhood for you, I guess.

Then we went to a Diamondbacks game!
It was such a cool stadium. It was super clean, had an "all you can eat section" (yes, of course we were in it), and a kids play area.


Holden loved the kids area for about 3 minutes until he discovered that there was a bigger, much cooler play area with huge slides that he wasn't old enough to go into . . . it was so sad. He threw a big tantrum over it because they wouldn't let him in.


While in Phoenix we also went to this Wild West show that was pretty cool. At this point, Holden was getting sick so we didn't stay very long. But he liked the gun show (as long as I kept the fruit snacks coming)

I kept telling Wes how good of a cowgirl I would have been, but he didn't buy it. He said I would be terrible at dealing with the heat and "roughing" it but consented that I'd be good at shooting and riding horses. I could totally rough it! As long as I had a nice bed.... LOL

Ok so I'm almost done! We also went to the Phoenix zoo which was really cool. It's 3 times bigger than the Hogle Zoo I swear and had lots of cool nooks with random animals, reptiles and birds. Holden would have liked it more were he not so sick. Sick babies are the worst. I felt so bad for him!

This is Wes's beard. I'm trying to get him to shave it. I mean, part of me likes the Mountain Man appeal of it, but only part of me. The other wants my husband's face back.

A Day in the Life of Our Busy Holds

1. He wakes up (happy after 12 hours of sleep).
2. He tries to wrestle away from us as we change his diaper.
3. He eats his yummy breakfast. He enjoys oatmeal or Life cereal and milk. Then he burps. On purpose. Repeatedly.
4. He "pays" plays) around the house, which involves running from one wall to the next or throwing his soccer, baseball, or basketball around.
5. He pulls down all his books from his bookshelf. We read books. Well, we read about 4 seconds of books. Then he reads to himself.
6. He takes a nap.
7. He wakes up and tries to wrestle away from us as we change his diaper
8. He eats his yummy lunch. He loves vegetables he can dip in Ranch dressing, minus the vegetables. Wes thinks he'd eat his own finger if it was dipped in Ranch. He loved hot dogs, sandwiches, pizza, and soups, and all fruits.
9. Lunch is followed by another round of on-purpose burping. We're regretting our laughter when he started doing this.....
10. We play outside and/or run errands and go on adventures.
11. He pulls down all his books. Again.
    
12. He takes another nap. Or just plays in his crib.
13. He wakes up (grumpy this time).
14. We go outside and play on the lawn or by the garden. He takes my garden markers out throws them around. Then he eats dirt.
15. I make dinner and Holden pretends to eat it. But mostly he just drinks milk.
16. He runs around the house again. Or pushes the vacuum around.
    
17. He takes a bath. Then brushes his teeth. First he sucks all the toothpaste off, then Wes or I take over.
    
18. He goes to bed. 9 on the dot. Don't expect him to go down prior, no matter how tired he is . . . he knows when it's 9.

Wes and Caleb's Birthday Bash - and The Crew

We had a combined birthday party for Wes and Caleb, since they both had birthdays in early May. It was bittersweet to be in Trisha's fantastic backyard, knowing since they're moving this month, there will be no more BBQ's there. Unless cool people move in. But cooler than Trisha and Caleb? Not a chance.

Cute Kristine, (Trish's sister in background) has been Holden's fantastic babysitter for the last several months . . . and her fiance in the background.

This is Holden, stealth little bugger he is, right before he steals off with someone's rootbeer. I caught him after he'd guzzled 3/4 of it. And Brad and Rachel, who are awesome. And Stacy who totally needs to get a blog, as we keep reminding her.

The Webers, who also think they are moving . . . we beg to differ. Sorry Laura it loooks like Wes cut you off . . . and the Thompsons who are new and we love them too.

Oh there you are Laura and Jeanette with the cutest baby girl ever. And Michelle and Scotty, our very closest neighbors!

And Heather and Garret - you guys need a blog too! Looks like Wes missed pictures of Colleen and Maura, who both moved from the ward but we can't quite let them go . . . LONG LIVE THE IVINS WARD!!

Gee Mom, is She Really For Me?

Holden has many girlfriends. We joke all the time with our friends that our kids are going "out" with each other. But we actually are kind of serious about matching up Holds with Liesel, our friends' Paul and Lara's new bebe. Holden met his betrothed a few weeks ago. And I think they're in love.

He was so intrigued by her. It's like he was saying, "gee mom, is she really for me?"

Well maybe Liesel is too young to know what true love is, but I'm sure Holden isn't. She is beautiful! He especially loved holding her foot. He already worships at her feet!


I think they're destined for each other. Holden agrees.

Don't Sell Your Soul to Buy Peanuts for the Monkeys

We went to the allergist yesterday to see what we were allergic to. I thought she'd test him for all kinds of allergies, but luckily she just tested for nuts. When we got there Holden was super happy, he played with the toys and talked on his Lego cell phone.


The doctor was fantastic. She answered a lot of questions and gave us a lot of material to read. She said to make our house peanut and cashew free, entirely (sad for mommy and daddy since we love peanut butter sandwiches), and to be staunch about not letting anybody give us any candy with peanut butter, etc. (ie no more Reeses peanut butter eggs, grammy Pammy!). Plus she said we shouldn't even be around it - so nobody should be eating peanut butter or peanuts in his presence. It's like a poison to him.


The nurse came in an gave him scratch tests on his back for Almonds, Peanuts and Cashews. He's HIGHLY allergic to cashews. And very allergic to peanuts. But showed no reaction to almonds. She said in kids Holden's age, they show their reaction to these allergens more in anaphylaxis - where it shows up all over his body, especially on the skin. They blow up, throw up, etc. And then they get older, they tend to more have the wheezing, asthma-type reaction to it.

Not only did the peanut and cashews make the parts of his back swell, but it also flared up his exzema. (sp?). So she gave us a prescription for that as well. And I was armed with two expensive epi-pens. Epinenephrine is somehow a cure-all. It's just your body's way of fixing things and that's what the epi-pen will do if Holden is ever not responding to Benadryl or seems faint, etc. after a reaction.


He wasn't so happy during and after the scratch tests, but words cannot describe how upset he was when the lab did blood tests. They took blood out of his arm vein like he was an adult! It was so sad. I had to hold him tight and he was so strong and fighting so hard that they couldn't get any blood - he wouldn't relax enough. So they had to do it all over on the other arm! It was so sad. He was so upset.

It's sad to me that he'll never enjoy the simple pleasure of a peanut butter and jam sandwich. It's also sad to me that I won't be enjoying them either. Did I tell you? I ate one last week and washed my hands so carefully - but like an idiot I kiss him on his cheek later, and he totally ballooned right there. So sad.

He'll be the boy sitting at the nut-free table, hopefully not alone. He'll be the boy with the mom who yells at NWA and Delta (via email) for introducing peanuts back into their snack selection. And the mom who scrubs down the seats of the airplane with hot soap and water and yells at the flight attendants for giving peanuts to the guy next to us. Ah nuts!

He's Back - With Jazz Hands

Students of some of the finer forms of international dance will instantly recognize some of the regional influences Holden incorporates into this particular interpretive dance piece. Marrying roaring 40's dixieland dancefloor moves, indigenous Central African tribal war ceremonies, and Bible-belt, mega-church holy-rollers, Holden expresses with a fluidity of motion a richly emotional message that, although words fail it in every regard, can be best interpreted as, "Mom! I need a nap and I got poops in my pants!"

He's a Maniac, Maniac on the Kitchen Floor

New Favorite Things about my Boy

New favorite things about Holden:

• He's starting to say "yea!" when I ask him questions. Like, "Holden, do you want to have some yummy dinner?" "yea!" But then he doesn't come follow me to the table. He just keeps playing. "Holden, do you want to go on a walk with mom?" "yea!" and then turns back to his toys. At least his first reaction isn't "no!"

• He eats oatmeal. I always wanted the kid who would eat oatmeal and Cream o' Wheat instead of the kid who eats sugar cereals (me, btw).

• When it's bedtime, he runs to his crib like he can't wait to get in. Seriously, he's been doing this for a week now. I'll say "Holden, do you know what time it is? It's night-night times!" He grins, runs to his room and starts pulling on the bars to his crib. Needless to say, we love this one.
  

Anniversary Getaway

Wes and I celebrated our 3rd wedding anniversary by ditching Holds and having 24 hours to ourselves. It was actually really fun! We missed him but he was so happy playing with his Grammy Pammy that he barely noticed we were gone.

The first thing we did was drive to Heber to the Avon theater and see Taken (which was freaking awesome). I cannot even remember the last movie we went to with each other. It's always him going with his friend or me with my friends. We never go to movies because Holden can't sit still and hates TV. And I can't really blame him for not wanting to sit through "He's Just Not That Into You," you know?

And then checked into this divine Bed and Breakfast in Midway called Invited Inn. I wish we had brought our cameras. The B&B was so comfortable, pretty and homey we absolutely loved it. They won my heart because they served Afternoon Tea and they won Wes's because of the private sauna in our bathroom! The bathroom was bigger than our kitchen at home. They had a jetted tub (as displayed below) AND a sauna AND a steam room in our own bathroom. It was amazing.

We went to dinner at the Blue Boar. Seriously, I would die happy if I had my last meal at the Blue Boar. We had shrimp, duck confit (don't look that up), Filet Mignon & Boar Ribs. It was amazing. Our breakfast the next morning at the Invited Inn was fantastic. We ate enough German pancakes to last us until dinner, all to the peaceful sound of trinkling water. Ahhhhh. It was wonderful.

My Little Anti-Vegetarian

My son is a meat eater. A carnivore through and through. He used to eat vegetables - broccoli, sweet potatoes, green beans, asparagus were his favorites - but now he looks at me like I'm nuts when I offer them. I try to sneak them into his mouth behind chicken so he can't see them, but as soon as he tastes it, he pulls out the offending greenery and, disgusted, drops it off the side of his high chair.
I think all this meat eating is changing his personality. He's more aggressive and demanding now. He's still sweet though - loves giving kisses and all that - but I'm a little worried he's going to turn into a caveman. Me love meat!
Maybe this is a boy thing. Maybe his body is craving what his body needs . . . does that sound right? I'm not sure. It sure is making him strong, though. He pulled and pushed this huge industrial cart all around Honeyville Grain. And try putting him down for a nap when he's not in the mood; he's so strong he can leave bruises. LOL I'm making him sound like a monster. But seriously. He's amazing. He's now walking up AND down stairs, not crawling. He holds onto rails and insists on going up and down like a big kid. He's such a big kid. My big, wonderful, loving, barbarian viking.